It all started at Beacon House Church when I was seven years old. This lady ran up and down the isles rambling on and on in tongues saying my dad was an evil man and needed to repent and come back to the Lord. Even when I was seven years old I knew in me that something was not right. I did not like this lady saying these things and saying they were from God. I did not like what she said about my dad. My dad had issues but God was dealing with those issues and praise Him now those issues are no longer an issue at all. The real problem was this woman was using a spiritual gift to destroy another person. I was seven and this was my first serious glimpse at spiritual warfare... I was confused, baffled, and disturbed all at the same time. I didn't understand the gift of speaking in tongues and I certainly didn't understand people being slain in the Spirit. So I started going to my aunt's baptist church where I was very comfortably involved in youth activities and had no fear of anyone being slain in the Spirit of rambling off in tongues. Instead I was just fed with the word of God so much that I was able to win awards for bible scripture memorization.
At the time my mom and dad really couldn't understand why I would not want to go to their own church but they were still happy I was learning the word of God. My mom worked diligently to help me memorize the scriptures and would quiz me and help me find ways I was able to use to help me to remember them. My dad also quizzed me and sang songs to me to help me try to remember some of them. It wasn't until later in life that I realized not even the baptist church was perfect. Soon I grew weary of the legalism they were instilling on their congregation. I thirst for more than just the word but seeing the word lived through lifestyle and not just meaning that we only could wear skirts and coo-lots. I meant I wanted a DEEEEP understanding of God. I wanted to know what it was like living my "all" for Him.
I searched years to find a church home where I was able to develop that intimacy with God. I wandered through several churches where I had a deep feeling that people were just "fake" like they were acting spiritually within the church and then returning home to their lives and doing things that were completely nonspiritual. They didn't realize how disturbing it was to me to see that when I HUNGERED!for the truth. Even my "now" fiance could tell you that the truth was not being taught the way it should have. However God brought me to an understanding in the midst of those churches that I needed to have a relationship with Him outside of church that would help me discern things. It all happened because of my grandma in North Carolina. My grandma was a fan of Benny Hinn who to me didn't seem like he was "all that". She also liked to read books and had a huge collection of the Left Behind Series and Frank Perretti books. I loved her books I would drool over them anytime I was around them. My grandma knew how much I loved her books so she shipped them to me one day not to long ago. When I opened up the cigarette smoke filled pages of Frank Peretti's "This Present Darkness" my eyes were wide opened... not only because I was reading but my eyes were also opened spiritually. This was the time I understood what spiritual warfare was this was the time where I was ready to do battle with Satan. This was the time I laid in my bed with my tongue sticking out asking for God to allow any gift of the spirit He wanted in my life to be put into my life. And so it was! I went to one of those churches I mentioned before... and although things weren't right I was so it didn't matter... God used me! He used me to pray over people and He showed me things in their lives to pray about. Many people didn't realize that when I was younger I started seeing demons... I didn't realize what I was seeing until I read my grandma's books. I didn't realize how much power God gives us to battle Satan. It is a battlefield out there! God gives us the ability to speak to Him in "code" so that He can help us fight off the enemy. That is what speaking in tongues is really about not casting down people but casting down the work of the enemy in peoples lives. I am 27 now and twenty years have gotten me to this point. When I was seven at that church where I learned God's word I gave my heart to Christ. Since then I've been hungry... it is great to finally be satisfied in the Holy Spirit.
"And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst…. I am the living bread which came down from heaven: if any man eat of this bread, he shall live for ever: and the bread that I will give is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world."
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